Poetry

I don't know what's wrong with me? Everyone finds a reason to leave :') My mind after all this doesn't seem free, My life seems like it's difficult to heave. My tears have turned all silent, My heart suddenly feels heavy. My mind's fucked, turned all violent, Depression is the tax my body has to levy. It just took you two days to replace me from the top, I thought I'd always be there and never would drop. My parents told me that the friends you make in college stay with you throughout your life, There was no one for me while I was falling into depression with a dive. There's no one around to tell my fears, No one, on who's shoulder would I shed my tears? Everyone saw the blood smears, I tried explaining it to someone , but no one hears. Laid down my ego to get you back, You didn't, now life kinda feels all blank. Guess I was on the wrong track, In all this pain, I had no one but at me to rant.

I don't know how to cry, Do I shed tears or blood smears? My face filled with salt is all dry, No one's ever washed it with their love in all these years. What helps more, therapy or self harm? I guess both are useless coz you're not coming back. Instead of my ringtone I only hear my alarm, Self respect I probably now what I lack. It's really sad how we've parted ways, Everyone fades, no one stays. But I thought our friendship wasn't like the other playable clays, After all we've been through this together for several days. I gave you your rightful space and time, This friendship now tastes more sour than lime. Suicide probably isn't such a heinous crime, My parents for me would get a small dime. I've been through this but it wasn't so bad, I've cried a lot but never been so sad. In college you probably were the only thing I had, Sorry we've lost each other to stupid reasons,lad. You said I didn't understand you,  I wanna ask you, if

I keep wondering why I was left out, Together we were yet I had this little doubt. Journeys looked short, Problems would wholly mount, I wish I could make every memory count. I'm all alone now and I miss it all, Neither a message nor a call. Now all I know is I'm alone and talk to this wall, Keeping me happy is this only game called football. Slowly I'll learn how to live without you, You'll be working on the same too. Isn't it sad how you left me without any clue? You'd say it's my fault, I'd say with a sad face,"How True!" Everything's changed, I'm not the same old guy, Like being alone now, I don't get why. Getting me back to normal? Give it a try, Only if you're sure enough that  I'm a good buy. As the days pass by I grow stronger, I don't know if I'll be able to handle it any longer. Friends you see yonder, I have new decisions and lessons upon to ponder. I wish this is all a bad dream, But they say dreams come

Didn't know it would come to an end so fast, 14th August to 29th September was the period we spoke. Thought breakups hurt, but bestfriends don't last, Dad calls me a toxic person for a reason, and I'm too broke. I was pissed at you for just letting my issue go, You were pissed at me for something stupid. I didn't sleep and cried all night, like woah! My issue was very serious and lucid. Everyone including you think I was trying to gain your attention, No one knew that it was such a huge thing for me. I've been having this gut feeling and it brought me into a tension, Little did I know that I would be left alone,among thee. I'm crying right now, while I write this down, Didn't want it to come to an end when we had 4 years. You'll now probably remove the crown, If you're in my room you probably see all tears and blood smears. Suffering is something which is taken up all alone, A perfect combo of tears and Post Malone. Knowing thi

Not a day goes without remembering you, Each tear I shed reminds me of the dew. The green grasses of Bangalore we played in, Didn't know the days would be so thin. I stay awake wondering if you miss me! When will be the day we would see?(each other) I wish magic existed so I would count, A hill which we would together mount. All day and all night I wish we were together, Cities might separate us. But our hearts are built of the same feather, Harsh would just be another plus. Ten days later you came into my life, 10 is my lucky number if you had no clue. Without you here I feel I'm at the edge of a knife, Loving each other and being there for each other, that's how we grew. It ain't easy living without you being here, Life's getting harder day by day. I wish we spend time stargazing with some beer, The oceans await us near the bay. I don't even know how I survive, I won't make it out the dark without your light. I don't even k

Somedays go about me thinking, I should have died in that operation theatre that day. Life's always kept me blinking, About the fact that my story could be presented on a movie theatre someday. It breaks me everyday to know that I have no one around now, The one who does really care is somewhere far. Yet how I bare everything is such a wow, Shubhi don't be surprised to find me wasted in some random bar. Everyday in the morning I get up thinking about the sleepless nights, Nights where I think about when will I able to see you. Heart waits, Mind thinks while switched off remain the lights, In these daydreams I wish I felt free and flew. What I feel right now isn't only emptiness, It's a mix of being lost and being depressed. College is been so hard and I find myself in pettiness, Pressure from everywhere, I just feel stressed. People who I cared about the most in college waved off a bye, In this phase of life where I'm again having a tough time.

Loved you like no one else would do, From calling you bestfriend, time passed by calling you 'BOO!' Life's a bitch but I'm sure we'll make iur way through, If you decide to take every step with me and move. When I'm down I just want a hug from you, If you're down, I'll give you a tight hug too. There was only one who I loved from the few, Being you! Don't miss me when I join the defence crew! Words won't be able to define how beautiful you are, Sorry if I don't have the face, house, money or car. Came into my life and made it bloom like a flower, For you, I'd jump off the Twin Tower. You know why I've been writing this? It's cause I just wanna hug you and pull you closer to kiss. Dying in your arms is my last wish, Having you in my dreams, all the memories I'll miss.

Many things changed over the years, My lifestyle, my attitude, my everything. All I wanted was things change from nothing to something, Nothing happened and they can be seen through these tears. They told me love is blind, I belived that, but I am not. Pain of not being loved felt like a gunshot. I realised no one loves me now, they did when I was a child. I loved her for what and who they was, Not for fame(coz she was famous), but it was true. This ended up me being hit by her shoe, I told her I loved her a lot for a cause. My love can't be defined, It can only be felt. Your hate made me a person not easy to be dealt, I would pull you close and hug you if you don't mind. You left me all alone, Making me feel guilty. Looks like I'll have to join the military, Listening to Post Malone.

Khush kardegi mujhe teri 'Jaadu ki Jhappi', Theek kardegi tumhari di hui 'pappi!' Jahan se bhi tu aa tapki, Ho gayi hai tu meri apni! Dukhi kardiya? Mujhe maaf kardena, Kuch chahiye? Mujhse keh dena. Pyaar chahiye? Mujhe apnalena, Par kuch bhi hi jaye, mujhse khafaa mat rehna! Tumhara chehra hi aisa hai jo mujhse bhule na, Tumhare saath jeena lagne laga hai sunhera. Rani jaise rakhunga, taaki gussa na hoye tu kabhi na, Churake dil le jaunga, aakhir thera mai jo lutera! Tumhari awaaz sunne ke liye tadapta hoon mai, Zindagi tumhare bin khaali-khaali si hai. May pyaar karnewala hoon, mujhe kya bhay? Apna kise kahun, Tumhare Sivaay!

Can't say how my days will unfold, Can't change what the future may hold. I want you in it, Every hour, Every minute. Even if you're not a part of it, For me it won't be much of a hit. Coz I can't stop loving you, I won't stop loving you. Baby,Let me make you believe in love, Finding you among the crows to be a dove. Don't ask me why I found you like this, Ask me why is it hard for me to miss. ( miss you :*) People say they'll keep you like a queen, Well I would say you are the queen. For me nothing matters but you, Hope you feel the same way too. I can't stop loving you, Babe I won't stop loving you. May you be the woman I woo, I hope you feel the same way too.  :)

On this road filled with light and people I walk alone, Not realising that I have nothing left but just a phone. A phone with music filling my ears through those earphones. Have a sim in the phone yet no call or the voice of my ringtone. Being lonely and left in the dark even in the path of light, I have no idea for what and whom to fight. The situation of my life being tight, The hate towards me has crossed Burj Khalifa's height. Since the 8th grade I've been suffering, People calling me mad, a psychopath, this is what I'm being, Being alone,having dark days. No one has been seeing. I'm glad no one has been seeing as they'll call me to be an attention seeker in the making. I don't like this world,don't like to live in it, Am I deservant of whatever I've done? Guess I'm not fit. Hurt my parents what a shameless guy, I'm not worth to spend a money on or to buy. Hunting, craving for someone to help me out, Most ready but don't need any. All I

These days went down without a call, Thought you'd atleast text. What's up with you my lil doll? I gradually started to believe in what was coming next. All these days I didn't hear my ringtone or notification sound, Not that my phone was on silent. To forget you I wasn't so easily bound, Days went by as my behaviour turned violent. I miss speaking to you, I miss your lovely voice. A few days later when I called, you picked up and asked, "who?" I got played dirty like one of these cheap lil toys. I wish everything turns to normal, I guess I might be wishing too much in return. I stopped believing that you'd come back saying sorry and being formal, Oh watch that fire inside me slowly burn. What went wrong with us I wonder, Probably I was never good enough for anyone. I feel all of it now, the huge blunder, You were my everyone♥️ It's probably come to an end now you see, Overthinking just made it al

I was hurt and put into my darkest time, Everyday I woke up early to the alarm chime. If someone were to ask me if I were fine? I'd tell them all about me when we sit and dine. Pulled down by my bad days, Oh the sunshine's gone by the funny haze. My mind is trying to get out the depressed phase, Oh it's the most difficult maze. I was told that good days would come, The insects and the bees would hum. Everyone thinks I'm really dumb, Oh this night I sit on my terrace with a bottle of rum. I've learnt how to be strong without you, The lord's given me this power too. I'm too fragile to look at you and say "who?" You know I miss you boo. My mind is fucked, heart is broken, The problems only visiting me with another token. After experiencing I've finally awoken, The hurt I felt should be off unspoken.

Sad is not only a word or an emotion, It's a mental state where you have no clue what's going on. When you're at a next level of sad, depressed you cry to fill the ocean. Nothing goes your way, and sometimes you start to imagine why you were born! Your friends come and tell you things will get better, I believed them like a fool and expected the same. Going through is phase trust me is a real sweater, But then I realised no one cares and with you, they only play a game. Never get stuck into any of these games, release yourself, When people say that they're enjoying their life, I wonder what I've done that I face all this by myself. It isn't hard to be in depression for 5 years and for freedom you still strive. They say college friends stay forever, but what if you don't have them? They say it for namesake that they're there but no one is actually there. Sometimes I need this to be told: "GO TIGER, GO GET EM" I was talking abo

The seasons come and go just like my thoughts of you Like the ocean so blue,Look what you've put me through, They change but in cycle that I can't lose You over everyone wasn't hard to chose. You came into my life, Just like another season Give me another smile, To love you I always find one or another reason. In the future I'll look for you in the past My heart seeing you beats so fast, Thinking of losing you I feel so aghast, Coz my love for you is so vast. Spring and Summer all the time, Will be the favorite of all my seasons. Look at all these flowers bloom, To love you I just find another reason. You came into my life Just like another Season, Giving you all my time, All of it just had some reason.

People think they're too good, What they don't realise that I too am one of a kind. My life is dark and fine as wood, And I'm not easy to find. Your shape is perfect, Your body is fine. It has done too much affect, Baby please be mine. Baby, Trust me, People will love thee. If they ask me who is she, I'll tell them you're the one who kissed me. It's 3 in the night, All is you that goes through my mind. Well I think I just might, Hug you tightly from behind. They say love is complex, I feel you're simple. Tears runing down those eyes through those specs, Baby, I'll wipe them off before they reach your dimple. I'm lost in your eyes, You are running through my mind. A clear skies night with full of fireflies, In your love I'm blind.

You had my trust, It was burnt to ashes. You had my heart, It broke it into pieces. I loved your soul, You hated my looks. Judged was the cover of books, I had nothing to do than to mourn. Loved you like no one would ever, Gave you all needed. Your words were "Leave me never", You left me cheated. We had our fights, Through the nights. You left me crying, On a street full of lighting.

I can't show you my sorrow, But I can give you all my love. Treat you like a dove, I wish these sorrows are gone by tomorrow. You showed me the museum in my empty building, Filled those empty hallways with our memories. Eating all those sweets and savories, My love senses are still tingling. You taught me everything, Except how to live without you. Look what you made me do, Still waiting for your whats app ping. People love you because you're hot, But I love the inner you,the soul. Believe me or not, in my feelings there is this little hole. Baby,We'll achieve everything together, All those dreams and wishes. No matter what's the weather, I'll give you those kisses.