Poetry

I don't know how to cry, Do I shed tears or blood smears? My face filled with salt is all dry, No one's ever washed it with their love in all these years. What helps more, therapy or self harm? I guess both are useless coz you're not coming back. Instead of my ringtone I only hear my alarm, Self respect I probably now what I lack. It's really sad how we've parted ways, Everyone fades, no one stays. But I thought our friendship wasn't like the other playable clays, After all we've been through this together for several days. I gave you your rightful space and time, This friendship now tastes more sour than lime. Suicide probably isn't such a heinous crime, My parents for me would get a small dime. I've been through this but it wasn't so bad, I've cried a lot but never been so sad. In college you probably were the only thing I had, Sorry we've lost each other to stupid reasons,lad. You said I didn't understand you,  I wanna ask you, if ...

I keep wondering why I was left out, Together we were yet I had this little doubt. Journeys looked short, Problems would wholly mount, I wish I could make every memory count. I'm all alone now and I miss it all, Neither a message nor a call. Now all I know is I'm alone and talk to this wall, Keeping me happy is this only game called football. Slowly I'll learn how to live without you, You'll be working on the same too. Isn't it sad how you left me without any clue? You'd say it's my fault, I'd say with a sad face,"How True!" Everything's changed, I'm not the same old guy, Like being alone now, I don't get why. Getting me back to normal? Give it a try, Only if you're sure enough that  I'm a good buy. As the days pass by I grow stronger, I don't know if I'll be able to handle it any longer. Friends you see yonder, I have new decisions and lessons upon to ponder. I wish this is all a bad dream, But they say dreams come...

Didn't know it would come to an end so fast, 14th August to 29th September was the period we spoke. Thought breakups hurt, but bestfriends don't last, Dad calls me a toxic person for a reason, and I'm too broke. I was pissed at you for just letting my issue go, You were pissed at me for something stupid. I didn't sleep and cried all night, like woah! My issue was very serious and lucid. Everyone including you think I was trying to gain your attention, No one knew that it was such a huge thing for me. I've been having this gut feeling and it brought me into a tension, Little did I know that I would be left alone,among thee. I'm crying right now, while I write this down, Didn't want it to come to an end when we had 4 years. You'll now probably remove the crown, If you're in my room you probably see all tears and blood smears. Suffering is something which is taken up all alone, A perfect combo of tears and Post Malone. Knowing thi...

Not a day goes without remembering you, Each tear I shed reminds me of the dew. The green grasses of Bangalore we played in, Didn't know the days would be so thin. I stay awake wondering if you miss me! When will be the day we would see?(each other) I wish magic existed so I would count, A hill which we would together mount. All day and all night I wish we were together, Cities might separate us. But our hearts are built of the same feather, Harsh would just be another plus. Ten days later you came into my life, 10 is my lucky number if you had no clue. Without you here I feel I'm at the edge of a knife, Loving each other and being there for each other, that's how we grew. It ain't easy living without you being here, Life's getting harder day by day. I wish we spend time stargazing with some beer, The oceans await us near the bay. I don't even know how I survive, I won't make it out the dark without your light. I don't even k...

Somedays go about me thinking, I should have died in that operation theatre that day. Life's always kept me blinking, About the fact that my story could be presented on a movie theatre someday. It breaks me everyday to know that I have no one around now, The one who does really care is somewhere far. Yet how I bare everything is such a wow, Shubhi don't be surprised to find me wasted in some random bar. Everyday in the morning I get up thinking about the sleepless nights, Nights where I think about when will I able to see you. Heart waits, Mind thinks while switched off remain the lights, In these daydreams I wish I felt free and flew. What I feel right now isn't only emptiness, It's a mix of being lost and being depressed. College is been so hard and I find myself in pettiness, Pressure from everywhere, I just feel stressed. People who I cared about the most in college waved off a bye, In this phase of life where I'm again having a tough time....

Loved you like no one else would do, From calling you bestfriend, time passed by calling you 'BOO!' Life's a bitch but I'm sure we'll make iur way through, If you decide to take every step with me and move. When I'm down I just want a hug from you, If you're down, I'll give you a tight hug too. There was only one who I loved from the few, Being you! Don't miss me when I join the defence crew! Words won't be able to define how beautiful you are, Sorry if I don't have the face, house, money or car. Came into my life and made it bloom like a flower, For you, I'd jump off the Twin Tower. You know why I've been writing this? It's cause I just wanna hug you and pull you closer to kiss. Dying in your arms is my last wish, Having you in my dreams, all the memories I'll miss.

Many things changed over the years, My lifestyle, my attitude, my everything. All I wanted was things change from nothing to something, Nothing happened and they can be seen through these tears. They told me love is blind, I belived that, but I am not. Pain of not being loved felt like a gunshot. I realised no one loves me now, they did when I was a child. I loved her for what and who they was, Not for fame(coz she was famous), but it was true. This ended up me being hit by her shoe, I told her I loved her a lot for a cause. My love can't be defined, It can only be felt. Your hate made me a person not easy to be dealt, I would pull you close and hug you if you don't mind. You left me all alone, Making me feel guilty. Looks like I'll have to join the military, Listening to Post Malone.