Suicidal

I don't know where to start from,

Pain has no begining of an end.

Life's not like just another rom-com,

Broken hearts are so difficult to mend.

I thought my life was done, I'd sleep forever,

My grave, I doubt will have flowers.

Happiness is something I've tried to endeavour,

Oh my look me loose my willpower.

Happiness will come it's way they said,

They never mentioned how long it'd take.

It's too late until you find me hanging dead,

Afterall it's all to do with the heartbreak.

I'm not lonely but I'm left all alone,

Why does everyone care when they see me no more?

Living the way now, I feel like I've all grown.

Look at all of your fake concern destroy me like claymore.

Would I get to live a life properly is my question!

It's a question for the next time I might be born.

It's not someone's feelings that matter but people's Instagram caption,

Only if me leaving you forever pricked you like a thorn.

I'll be there for you is what all of them keep telling me.

I have a question for you, will you be there when I rest my head easy on the death bed?

Only if you spoke to me when I was in your need and not when you were free,

Leave the grave, while the genuine people have tears to shed.

I see no one around my grave now,

Days passed, years passed, decades did.

It's for the formalities that on two days you guys in pretending pain, bow.

A vague happiness behind that fake sad face hid.

Imagine if I were gone, would life change?

I doubt it because I hadn't done anything great.

All I ever did was stay genuine and actually care about our greetings exchange,

In the end, why do I always end up with all the hate?

Only if people accepted for who I was,

I didn't have to pretend to be someone else .

Money after you all die is not in your release clause,

My love for most of you was true and dense.

I'm sorry if I've let anyone of you down,

I swear I didn't mean to, I was just trying to help.

I was just learning how to swim with you guys while I slowly started to drown.

A life guard could have saved me, but I've been caught on the inside by the kelp.